But very few of us act on what we know.
The excuses are endless: I'm tired, I have no money, my parents are awful, my country sucks, I'm going through a divorce, there are no jobs out there, who's going to hire me. Those are some of the excuses I've used in the past.
We don't act because we lack drive, passion, heart, willpower, self-motivation, and discipline. And because of that, we limit our potential.
By looking outside toward circumstance to excuse and remedy your feelings and excuse your current behaviors, you’re spoiling the flowing, happy, and fruitful life journey you seek.
You create your perception and experience of life from the inside-out, not the outside-in. Nothing or nobody can make you feel something you don’t think. Your thinking, and only your thinking, creates your feelings. So when you feel low, it has nothing to do with what is going on in your life—no matter how much it might look otherwise.
People who believe there's a direct connection between their feelings and the world outside constantly feel the need to cope. They look for help and relief in external strategies often through motivational experts, self-help gurus or illicit behavior. These people make three unintentional but damaging mistakes:
They mess up their thinking.
They disconnect themselves from their own inner wisdom.
They suppress their innate ability to overcome.
The truth is that human beings are wired to rise above anything, without resistance. Our ability to get over things is so natural that most of the time we don’t even notice it. We are very resilient.
What I’ve witnessed, over and over again, is that people with a keen sense of the thought-feeling connection have consistently worked with their mindset.
But how on earth can you do that?
I'm speaking about the voice in your head. We all have one. However, for all of us, the voice is saying something different. Maybe your voice says that you suck, or that you’re too old, or too young, or whatever. It doesn’t matter.
What matters is that you must take control over that voice and steer it in the right direction.
Why do some people seem to handle adversity and be happy with their life, while others seem to spend their time feeling sorry for themselves and whining endlessly about how crappy their life is? The answer has to do with the degree to which a person understands how the human mind is wired. The mind is designed to take out previous, out-dated, and churned-over thoughts—and spin it into an innovative, new, and uncontaminated thought.
People who move gracefully through hardship know that when their minds are racing, or jumbled, their perspective is fuzzy. So if they try to fix a problem (ranging from small stuff such as broken stapler to a more severe life event such as a tragedy), they’ll get in the way with the mind’s natural ability to regulate to clarity. And they’ll thwart new thoughts—and solutions—from arriving.
To sum up, at times we all sweat the small stuff. Yet, for some, anxiety builds up because they don't realize that fighting a wayward experience always makes matters worse.
This brings us to another important lesson that I hope you’ll take from this article: Knowing that your feelings come from the inside (your thinking), and not the outside (your circumstances/environment), is what allows your state of mind to bounce back (self-correct) when you are troubled.
You might not feel it right now, but, in principle, if you simply stay out of the way when faulty thinking shows up; if you stop over-thinking and over-analyzing, a clear and free-flowing thinking will appear. And so will your tendency to get over anything that life has in store.
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