One of the most fascinating secret weapons of the human mind is its resiliency. Let’s face it, life can be pretty bumpy at times, and yet some people generally push on much the same as they always have, sometimes even with a spring in their step and a smile on their face.
The trick, however, of this super power is to not interfere.
That said, here are my five suggestions to keeping your innate ability to "self-correct" your psychological immune system and keep it revving at its full capacity:
Know where your feelings come from.
The most dangerous mistaken belief known to humans is that our feelings result from our circumstance (the past, the uncertain future, the actions of others, our environment) when, in truth, they come from the inside—from the ups and down of our own thinking. Feeling low, looking outside, and blaming what you find is an infallible way to hamper your psychological immune system. Don’t look outside when you’re down and feeling frustrated.
Stop trying to feel better.
Designing your entire life on self-improvement just doesn’t work. We don’t heal our physical, mental and spiritual pain through trying to feel better, instead we usually just end up being more consumeristic, jumping from one coping strategies to the next including various self-help techniques, mental tools, gambling, drugs and alcohol. All you're confirming to your mind is that "You're not enough", while getting more frustrated and going into more debt, as you jump from one solution to the next looking for something to make you feel better. Your mind doesn’t need your help. Focusing on achieving perfectionism in order to improve your behavior is plainly not helping you find long-term peace of mind —much less helping you live your life with resiliency, harmony, productivity, and excellence.
Wrestling with your thoughts is irrelevant.
Over analyzing your thoughts is never in your best interest. You’ll just feel bad when you over-think and over-analyze. You’ll feel better when your mind is relatively clear. Sure, it’s natural for us to adopt the "squirrel mind"; what’s counterproductive is to dig into what you’re thinking about (that’s a learned behavior). To self-correct with ease, remember: It’s that you think—not what you think.
Stop adding content to your thoughts.
How do you feel when you’re at your best? Radiant? Creative? Grateful? Connected? What you’re feeling is a lack of personal thought. Meaning, you can’t think your way to clarity. And, again, all mental strategies require thinking.
Stay in the game.
What happens when you think yourself into anxiety and just plain misery? Right, it grows. Deliberately not looking inward at your bad feeling only holds the bad feeling in place. It’s okay to intuitively take a break, but the secret to resiliency is getting on with life and allowing your psychological immune system to wipe the slate clean. We are all blessed with a remarkable capacity to get over, and make sense of, things. Stay in the game.
There’s the list. I know you have questions, comments, and criticism? Refer to your psychological immune system and call me in the morning.